Funny jokes about online dating

Funny jokes about online dating


Com A military base commander called to complain that the weather-forecasting software our company created for them kept reporting 
unexplainable wind shifts. Sent a recruit to medical-supplies office in search of fallopian tubes. Thanks for coming back for me, the airman said, jumping on the back of the scooter. Comedian Dick Gregory During basic training at Fort Leavenworth, our sergeant asked if anyone had 
artistic abilities. Bite that freak who gives me that shot every year. Had a new guy conduct a 
boom test on a howitzer by yelling Boom! All you have to do is remove the dirt. If your life sucked last year, its probably still going to suck tomorrow. Realize that y vampires werewolves  dont exist no matter how much I want them to. Wanda kaltreider, Wrightsville, Pennsylvania During orientation at Fort Sill, in Oklahoma, our first sergeant stated that if anyone lost his locker key to see him, as he kept a master. 4) At the real-life Topgun programthe one the film was based on
there is a 5 fine for any staffer who 
references or"s the movie. He stormed off and returned carrying a small potted tree. Cats: Use new living room sofa as scratching post. I have only one resolution: To rediscover the difference between wants and needs. What do you use on your face to keep it so smooth? The average age of people living in our military retirement community is 85. 2) American combat dolphins, 
deployed in the Persian Gulf, 
surrounded and captured an 
Iranian battleship. If anyone asks you why youre carrying this tree, you will say, Its to replace the oxygen I stole from everyone else. While everyone was concentrating on the task at hand, I held up a spare pin and asked, Has anyone seen my grenade? Thomas Clements, Catonsville, Maryland Next time I send a damn fool, 
I go myself. New Years Eve One Liners A New Years resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. Find out why all my clothes have shrank. Come to understand that cats are from Venus; dogs are from Mars. They came up with that name using Operation Random Thesaurus. 
Turning to the sergeant, he asked, Gunnery, where is my foxhole? Scott Fitzgerald I don't even drink on the New Year! Why, certainly, young man, he said, as he reached under his desk and handed me a large pair of bolt cutters. New Year's Traditions New Year's Traditions in America An Irish Girl comes back for New Years. As the clock struck - the bartender was almost crushed to death. Angelo Giordano, Bellevue, Nebraska My husband is infantry, and 
he said the most wonderful things 
to convince me to marry him: The closets could all be mine since he wears. I don't think we're the same person all our livesSteven Spielberg. He grabbed a bagel and took a seat. Com) is the author of Confessions 
of a Military Wife, published by Savas Beatie. My life is, like, really, really funParis Hilton Celebrate what you want to see more ofTom Peters If you asked me for my New Year Resolution, it would be to. The Wish On New Year's Eve, Patty stood up in the local bar and said that it was time to get ready. Gary Severson, Nooksack, Washington 1) In World War II, a German 
U-boat was sunk because of a 
malfunctioning toilet. Trask (his last name) used that 
heritage to lord it over me. New Year Prayer Dear God, So far this has been great! He had noticed that, for the umpteenth time, a recruit kept going to his right on a left command. You will carry this tree with you wherever you go. Our instructor approached the 
directionally challenged Marine 
and stomped on his left foot. Youre standing in it, sir, said 
the sergeant. He replied, When they stopped shooting at me. He calls out to the boy, "Hey son, what you got there?" to which the boy replies, "It's duct tape, I'm gonna go catch me. My grandpa Bob was in the Navy. Top 10"s for New Years First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. The other asked, Where have you been all this time? Sure enough, a few weeks later, I lost my key.